Ever been near "that guy"? Or has it been you?
We all know what the typical musky BO smells like and the corn chip smell just doesn't seem to belong. Some people smell like corn chips when they sweat... what?! just what is going on?
I did what anyone would do... I consulted a reputable doctor, a young guy, lots of stars on yelp. His name is Dr. Google (pretty positive it is pronounced "Goooooooooooglay.) He sees a lot of patients but if your name is Bing or Jeeves he totally tunes out.
Anyway, Dr. Google told me that the corn chip smell is from bacteria which solves the mystery but adds an ick factor. The other ick factors were the additional questions that Dr. Google's nurse Wiki Answers, RN provided.. (and I am not making this up although I will be inserting my own vocabulary).
All of this was on the same page:
"Why does my [vajayjay] smell like onions?" [what the hell? sounds like someone needs Valtrex].
"Why do my balls smell like cheese?" [Is that where cheeseballs come from?]
"Why does your groin sweat smell like pus?" [Good God! Sounds like the wifi is on at the free clinic]
"If you smoke opium, what does it smell like?" [corn chips??]
"Where does the corn from Takis corn chips come from?" [hopefully not someone's armpit or groin]
So seriously, if you smell like corn chips and you were not just scarfing down a bag of honey BBQ delights from Frito-Lay....you may have some bacteria brewing in there.
As for cheeseballs... you are on your own, Chester Cheetah.
Showing posts with label Honey Badger. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Honey Badger. Show all posts
Friday, May 16, 2014
Thursday, May 15, 2014
Welcome to the Honey Badger Files
Welcome to Day One of the Honey Badger Files.
Be forewarned.... I came up with this idea while eating scrambled eggs and fried pastrami on a plastic Pokémon plate, guzzling "limon pepino" Gatorade, and soaking in a bathtub full of Epson Salts at 11:30 in the morning. I spend my days languishing about in my underwear, taking care of three daughters, avoiding housework, and training Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
You have been warned.
Be forewarned.... I came up with this idea while eating scrambled eggs and fried pastrami on a plastic Pokémon plate, guzzling "limon pepino" Gatorade, and soaking in a bathtub full of Epson Salts at 11:30 in the morning. I spend my days languishing about in my underwear, taking care of three daughters, avoiding housework, and training Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
You have been warned.
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